


Bored

by ElizaMatt



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: F/M, Implied/Referenced Incest, M/M, Multi, Random & Short, Sibling Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-13
Updated: 2020-09-14
Packaged: 2021-03-07 01:46:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26448757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElizaMatt/pseuds/ElizaMatt
Summary: Just a random Klaus/Diego thing.
Relationships: Diego Hargreeves/Klaus Hargreeves
Kudos: 32





	Bored

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Klaus is bored.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No idea if this story is going anywhere, but if it does, it will be explicit.

Klaus was bored. Being sober was frightening enough at night with all his random dead guests, but it was also very boring during the day. So boring that he was even considering making small talk with his siblings. But Five was busy scrubbing blood stains out of his school uniform and only mumbled strained profanities when Klaus tried to engage him in a little conversation.

"Well, excuse me for making an effort, Young Man," Klaus giggled. "Children these days. They grow up so fast..." He slunk out of the bathroom and stopped in the doorway to Allison's room. She was sitting in front of her gilded mirror, putting on a bright red lipstick. Luther was sitting at the edge of her bed, slumped over, looking to the world like a huge scruffy dog waiting for a delicious treat.

"Allison?" Klaus said softly.

"Yes?" she said dreamily as she put down the lipstick and started to brush her hair. Luther sighed deeply so the bed shook.

"When you finally do go to bed with our brother, would you be a dear and say: _rumor has it your orgasms are silent?_ Or else we all might just lose our hearing!"

The hairbrush would have hit him if his supernatural catlike reflexes hadn't told him to move away quickly.

Klaus sighed and sauntered out into the kitchen where Vanya sat and stared out the window. Klaus went over and wrapped his arms around her,

"If you need anything...help to look up women in California in the sixties, drugs or the name of an amazing lesbian prostitute - I'm here for you! That's what brothers are for, after all."

She started laughing and shook her head,

"You are impossible...Are you still sober?"

"Painfully so," he sighed. "And FYI, your siblings are all extremely unattractive when hey're not blurry...And speaking of the extremely unattractive. Have you seen Diego?"

She opened her mouth and then bit her lip,

"He told me not to tell you..."

He rolled his eyes,

"He is such a child. Well, don't tell me, then. But advice me: where _shouldn't_ I go to avoid running into him?"

Diego was busy polishing his many knives in the library. It was a labor of love. Klaus paused in the doorway and just watched him. His long slender fingers caressing the knife handle. The dark hair falling down into his eyes and the impatient attempt to swat tickling hairs away from his eyes without stabbing himself.

"You know, people with an actual working brain would probably tie their hair back before they started handling pointy objects..."

Diego huffed to the knife,

"That so?"

Klaus pushed himself forward and slunk closer,

"Yes, that is so. And I think you would look just fetching with a tiny man bun." He reached out his hand, but Diego held up the knife,

"What are you doing?"

Klaus perched his lips,

"Touching your hair...unless you plan on penetrating me instead with one of your mighty blunt instruments?"

Diego stared at him. Klaus noticed with delight that his cheeks were turning a distinct red flush.

"What?" Diego swallowed with difficulty.

"Your knife?" Klaus reached out and removed it from his hand. "Before you hurt yourself...Unless you were thinking of a completely other sizable instrument?" He held his gaze and slowly stroke the knife handle as the thought wound its way through Diego's maze-like brain. Finally it clicked and Diego swore at him,

"Stop touching my knives!"

Klaus sat himself up on the table a little too close to his brother and threw the knife between them,

"If that's what turns you on ... but that _will_ make our lovemaking a little one sided." He reached out and slowly let his fingers comb through Diego's hair. It was surprisingly soft and Diego let it happen a little longer than Klaus expected. Then the sexual innuendo sank in and he gasped,

"I...fuck...Klaus!"

"Okay, if you say so," Klaus grinned and moved off the table before Diego could hit him. "But one of these days you're going to wake up with braids."

He turned around in the door and saw Diego's head snap around, hiding he had been watching him walk away. _Well, well, well,_ he thought. _My subtle seduction technique seems to be working._ The flush had traveled from his brother's face and onto his neck as Diego stubbornly refused to look up.

_Next step: clothes-less Fridays._


End file.
